MommyLife | The Working Mom with Becca Johnson

I am realizing more and more as I walk through mommyhood that this sense of "I'm the only one who struggles with (fill in the blank)" is something that SO MANY of us feel.  That everyone else's lives are perfect.  I'm the only one who has really hard days. We mask our reality with cheery and flowery Facebook status updates, hoping no one really knows that we feel so very alone.
  
Time to change that.


I care too much about us moms to let that continue.  So I have decided that once a month I am going to showcase a mother.  Stay at home moms.  Working moms.  Single moms.  Ministry moms.  Moms of boys.  Moms of girls.  Adoptive moms.  My goal is to connect us so we stop feeling alone, so we stop assuming that some of us have it better than others, and to start to encourage one another!  


So here starts the beginning of MommyLife. The ups, the downs, and the in-between.  


I chose my sister, Becca, to be my first candidate.  She is my Working Mom.  

She works at Pearce 4 Kids as both the head Pre-K teacher(Monday thru Thursday) and director of the Afterschool Program (Monday thru Friday).  

ME: So what does a normal day look like?

BECCA: I am the first one in our house to wake up each morning since I take the longest to get ready  Denis is the next to wake up and he drags Norah out of bed. Ok. Drags is maybe the wrong word, but she does love her sleep and most days we are rushing to get her ready for school. Once she is up, she is usually off to a slow start. She likes to have time to really wake up. Phineas and Ferb is her show of choice most mornings! I at some point in time lauch her clothes down the stairs to Denis and start getting her ready. Here is where the real fun starts! She doesn't enjoy this part of the day at all. She does much better for Denis than for me though, hence this being his "job." Once that is done, Denis needs to start getting ready so up the stairs he goes. So it is my "job" to get her hair done and her shoes on and her coat on. I think hurding cattle would be easier than this. She runs away as soon as she sees the spray bottle and comb. She has serious opinions about what shoes she wants to wear and NEVER wants to get her coat on. So I decided for both our sanity to make up a song for this routine. That way she knows as soon as this song starts what needs to happen. She even sings along now. "Gotta get my coat on. Gotta get my shoes on!!!" Yeah. I'm cheesy like that. 

So next comes actually getting out the door and into the car. She has to collect as many blankies and possible in order to do this without melt downs. She gets them all in her little arms only to hand them to me so she can open the door, walk down the stairs, run across the garage and attempt to open the garage door on her own. After she gets out the door, I use that opportunity to throw all but one blankie back in the door. Most days this goes unoticed! Once she is buckled in, which she MUST do on her own, the rest of the morning runs smoothly. 

Drop of is pretty drama free. These days she says "bye mom" before I even intitate it. Miss Independent.

She has shown that she doesn't not tolorate me visiting her. She will break down when I try to leave so as much as it pains me, I spend most of my days watching the hours creep by till I can see her again. I also watch her from the window and attempt not to be seen. I am not always sucessful....

She is almost always the last one in the daycare since I close Pearce. Sometimes she hangs out with me in my office toward the end of the day. I love when she does. She colors or has a snack and makes my staff happy by saying their names or laughing at their silliness. She is one popular kid around here.

Evenings are different all the time depending on the day. Most evenings I live for the moment that I am curled up in her rocker reading her stories and singing songs. I share these special moments with Denis too since she would much rather be around him most of the time. Then into her crib she goes. Most nights without a peep. I couldn't have asked for a sweeter baby girl.

ME: Do you ever feel any guilt about putting Norah in daycare?


BECCA: At first yes. Very guilty. After working in a daycare for several years I promised myself that I wouldn't ever do it. Not because of the quality of care because Pearce 4 Kids gives EXCEPTIONAL care (if I may say so myself) but because I was determined that I would be the one giving my baby kisses all day long or being present for every single milestone. I didn't want to miss a thing. But after a few months of Norah coming to daycare everyday I realized what an incredible help daycare was to my ability to mother. Being in daycare has helped Norah realize that she isn't the only baby in the world. She has been taught to wait. To share. To stand in line. Not to hit. (Yes, she went through a bullying phase). They have helped her transtion from two naps to one. She LOVES playing with her friends and just being a kid. I'm not sure I would have been a good enough mother to find ways to offer her these things otherwise! There are some days that I struggle with dropping her off and leaving her all day. But only because I am selfish when it comes to her. But everyday she comes I am fully confident that she is getting incredible care and everytime I peek in that window, I see that smile I love so much.

• ME: Don't forget the biting phase. ouch

ME: Oh wait, maybe that was my kid.

BECCA: Oh, yes, how could we forget about the biting.  Must be in the genes.


ME: So what's the most difficult thing about being a working mom?


BECCA: The moments I miss. She crawled and walked for the first time in daycare. I am thankful that my classroom and office are in the same building and I am but a phone call away. Her teachers are wonderful at snapping video for me and capturing the funny moments I miss. It is hard because I work 2 jobs so I only really have one full day to devote to her. That one day is what gets me through the other 6 days of the week.


ME: How does your second job come into play? How does that change the face of your days?


BECCA: I work part time at our church as well. (The Father's House) A majortiy of my hours there are spend on a sunday. This part of my life wouldn't work if it weren't for my inlaws. They come at the crack of dawn to make sure that we can get to church on time without a toddler in tow. I LOVE what I do at church. Leading worship makes me feel alive, but it is definitely more challenging as a mother. I also have rehearsals most Monday evenings which Norah comes to with Leandra. I love that she sings and dances along to the songs and is learning at a young age that ministry is in her blood. We will never stop being involved in the local body. We have gone away several times this past year on ministry trips as well. Even though Norah has yet to join us on one of these trips, there will come a day when she will get to experience that side of minsitry with us as well.


ME: If you could give any advice to the working mom, what would it be?


BECCA: Don't be afraid to make the sacrifices it takes to be a working mom. It may seem hard and stressful or cause guilt and confusion. But for me I want Norah to look back 25 years from now and see that it can be done. If she ever wonders if it is the right move for her she can be assured that I had her best interest in mind. That I always wanted the best for our family and for her. I would want every mother to trust that still small voice inside them. If for a season you need to work then do it. If you are blessed to be able to stay at home then do it. If you get to do both then do it. Everyone has a different story to tell. I am personally excited to read the many different stories that have yet to be told through this blog post series!!

ME:Let's talk about Norah for a bit.  What mommy/daughter moment sticks out in your mind?

BECCA: I think the first one that comes to mind is the moment we came home from South Africa after being apart from Norah for 13 days.  As long as I'll live, I'll never forget the excitement she had seeing me.  That moment we had as a mother and daughter when she recognized me suddenly - I realized how genuinely excited she was to see me.  I felt such joy and i think it was one of the most memorable times - maybe the first time, when I realized how connected a mother and daughter really are.

ME: Are there days when the "Jesse Spano"comes out in you?

BECCA:"There's no time, there's never any time!" (that's for all you Saved by the Bell fans!)

I think there is a moment everyday where something doesn't get done where I make the purposeful choice to say, "Its just not vital to the success of my day".  Whether it's dishes, vacuuming, or whatever - its just isn't as vital as being with Norah.  That's just part of being a working mom.

ME: And here is the ultimate question of all questions?  You ready?  

BECCA: Oye

ME: When is the next little Johnson going to make their appearance?

BECCA: Oh my, no comment.  

Riiiight, - at the risk of sounding super spiritual... it's in the Lords time right now because we have given up our timeline.  Its only God's timeline that will ever work.

ME: Oh, and how awesome is your brother in-law?

BECCA: Awesome-est.  Best brother in-law I've ever had.  Definitely my favorite.  Did I mention he's the only one I have?

      *Can you tell who eventually took over the interview process?  :-)

So thank you to Becca who allowed me to shadow her around at work, and for putting up with all of my (and Mike's) questions.  You're the best!

And please comment! I would love your feedback on this! To know that this is reaching people!!!  

Love to all you working mommies. What you do is not easy by any stretch of the imagination, and know that you are supported!